Do You Have to Give Birth to be a Mother?
I thought this was a legitimate question when Mother’s Day was approaching. With Jeni being 25 weeks pregnant, wee Mac was still the size of an eggplant – not to mention still in her belly. So I wasn’t sure how to celebrate Mother’s Day with her this year. I was pretty sure she wouldn’t want to watch the Lakers / Mavericks playoff game – which turned out to be a good thing as Dallas crushed LA – making me hate Dallas so much that I wished it was me who shot J.R.
Originally I had planned on making her breakfast in bed like I did the week before on her birthday, but Jeni pulled a Wimpy and was craving a cheeseburger. So we decided to go to this new burger joint that everyone was all excited about. It reminded me a little bit of The Max, with the exception that Zach and Kelly weren’t smooching in one of the corner booths. Everything was cool until I decided to put my foot rather than my burger in my mouth. When the waiter wished us a Happy Mother’s Day, I turned into Screech Powers and said, “Well she’s not a mother yet.”
Much like my burger later that evening, my response didn’t sit well with Jeni. She wasn’t angry as much as she was annoyed. At first I didn’t see anything wrong with what I had said – hence the Daft part of DaftDaddy. But once Jeni explained to me all of the sacrifices she has had to make just so wee Mac can continue punching and kicking her like a bad Steven Seagal movie, I had to reconsider my position. So to all you future dads out there, make sure you acknowledge Mother’s Day even if your wife is just pregnant. Otherwise you may end up like J.R. Ewing.